Missouri River

kc sprint championships by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

Race Director Scott Mansker takes advantage of a quiet pre-race moment to tell the assembled crowd a fish story.

The Mann family, Joe (rear left with white ballcap), Grandpa Hoot, and Grandson Frank took top style points by winning 2 divisions with 3 generations of racers.

Women's solo division winners. Left to right in 1st,2nd,and 3rd were: Katie Pfefferkorn, Shannon Twenter, and Barbara Stoppelmoor.

This was a tough landing in high water.

Well worth the price of this downriver run was a trip back to Kaw Point in Race Organizer Russ Payzant's beautifully restored 1950's era cabin cruiser.

river otter day by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

Unless I'm counting cards at the Black Jack table I'm generally not a fan of casinos. Occasionally though, they seem to do the right thing such as helping to sponsor River Otter Day. River Otter Day isn't really about otters but more about the Missouri River and riverfront development both of which could use some help. There have been some significant improvements in Kansas City's riverfront in the past 5 years. I suspect before the next decade passes we might even see a restaurant or two that overlooks the river. Not sure what the city has to do to develop a marina downtown but it could be as simple as rerouting the few barges that still use the Big Muddy to the Mississippi.

2009 mr340: m.o.i.'s experience by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

The short and sweet of it. From m.o.i.'s initial perspective this year's mr340 felt like an ass-whupping on the river. I say that and then remember that after being ready to throw in the towel midway through the race I did manage to stop sucking my thumb and begin enjoying myself a little and FINISH. ALIVE. This matters. Thirty second place in my division - ahead of some 62 other men's soloists - 103rd overall. A victory of perseverance which, lacking charm, good looks, and wealth, happens to be one of my best qualities.

Yes, the time was a little slower than last years but our hip rotation must have been much better this year because it's my back that's a little tight, not my shoulders. Joint pain? excepting a few knuckles on my hands, I have none. My biggest problem are my swollen and numb feet, an indication that I was driving my legs throughout the race; I'm hoping it disappears soon.

Outside of the hotshots who compete in this race, for the rest of us this race is more about chasing away the mind demons. The ones that say to you, "you can't do that", "forget doing that", or "you're really not cut out for that". The process to make the demons disappear is fairly simple. Stay in the boat and paddle.

The race is also about asking for and receiving the help of others. My field crew essentially consisted of 5 people-the logistics of kayaking to St. Louis and getting yourself and the boat back in one piece isn't that easy. My daughter Sarah delivered me to the start line and told me to shut up and relax when the thunderstorms delayed the start. She also picked me up from the Amtrak station upon my return and cleaned my car in the intervening days of the race. Anyone who knows my Homer tendencies knows that this isn't a small task. My unflappable friend WendE delivered supplies at several checkpoints along the way, handed me a raspberry Slurpee at the finish line, and solicited the help of fellow conservationist Steve Van Rhein who was able to witness first hand the carnage, joy, and sense of accomplishment this race brings to folks. Next year his lame excuses run out and he climbs in a boat and comes along or he'll find himself blowing on my tender feet again. Being younger, stronger, and more fit Steve might even beat me downriver but my veteran status suggests that I might just kick his ass (undaunted braggadocio is one side effect of finishing this race). Another pal, former Conservationist Ruth Wallace (does one detect a trend in my choice of crew?) had my halfway point resupply cache waiting in the sand at Jefferson City. I was also assisted on numerous occasions by John Dunn who kept throwing bananas and the advice to "get some sleep" my way.

Time for a new adventure. It may be as simple as trimming the hedge or organizing the house. It may be as complex as facing down the MAN at the day job, tackling the Yukon Quest, or romancing the stone. Whatever it may be, it'll likely be shorter than 340 miles on the Muddy MO in August.

Race directors Karin Thomas, Russ Payzant, and Scott Mansker see which favors they can call in to get the rain to stop.

Favorite moments from this years mr340:

Reconnecting with the Ninja Raccoons, meeting their prospecting field chief, and being able to share a little of our city with them before the race.

A 1 hour nap, a banana, and a bottle of Ensure courtesy of Bill Lanning's daughter.

Sleeping on the Katfish Katy ramp with no one around and being refreshed for once upon arriving at Cooper's Landing.

Flipping my kayak while trying to land it on the Noren beach and not caring one iota especially after being handed a piping hot cup of french press from my friend Vicki.

Watching the locals shoot 8-ball on the regulation sized pool tables at the River Bend Bar in Portland and then imitating Carter Johnson by stuffing a double cheeseburger from same bar in my pocket and paddling off into the setting sun.

Sharing a hotdog and a cup of The World's Greatest Limeade ver.3.0 with Wende and Steve at the Herman Checkpoint.

Throwing the ashes (stuffed inside a toy dinosaur) of former racer, Trex the Rare West Tibetan Mountain dog, deep into the river from the barge dock below the finish line and watching booger catch a ride on the thalweg.

Seeing friendly faces at every stop and people who gave me cold water, bananas, peanut butter sandwiches, words of encouragement, and even a cup of freshly brewed coffee.

Joanie's post-race slideshow of Machu Picchu.\

Being a tourist in St.Louis after the race, riding the light rail downtown, checking out CityPark Sculpture Garden, and having the Amtrak run on time.

Finding out that Darling Daughter Dora had detailed six months of Kansas River silt and sand from my car.

Least favorite moments:
Being scared of capsizing in the windy wake of 270 boats for the first 30 minutes of the race, the energy-sucking crossing through the gale blowing across the Missouri City bend, and the toxicity of too much adrenalin.

Not sufficiently testing my new watering/electrolyte system and having to drink only electrolytes for the first 50 miles.

Bonking hard on the run into Booneville.

Trying to put contacts in my eyes and losing several on the sandy ramp at Klondike (The fun part though was ignoring John Dunn's advice, "you're not going to put that sandy lens in your eye, please tell me you're not going to do that!" Yes John I am. But first the hydrologist must triple rinse!.

Missing 90 percent of the awards ceremony due to poor service at the Mill Creek Brew House.

Losing two $25 hats-both favorites. The new rivermiles hat flew off in the wind during the first 10 miles of the race and my USGS shade hat eventually shredded from UV damage.

Images by Sarah Star via flickr. see more images at dokidokididikoko's photostream

2009 mr340: contact dermatitis by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

The mr340 comes with its own set of aches and pains if one expects to get full value from the race. Tendinitis, sunburn, chafing, heat exhaustion, loss of sensation in extremities, and weird skin rashes seem to pop up with the regularity of Corps wing dikes. We must remain vigilant to prevent toxic waste from entering our streams; toxic waste comes in many forms-some obvious and some not. As Paracelsus said, it's the dose that makes the poison so just because something is released in very small quantities into the environment doesn't mean it doesn't harm the biota. Ask the next 3-legged Simpson frog you see how they feel about trace amounts of atrazine in runoff.

Although the US certainly has some of the cleanest waters in the world, we have also polluted many stretches our rivers. Few rivers can be considered pristine. Even mountain headwaiter streams frequently have detectable quantities of human personal care products.

Despite the efforts of anyone, including the racers, involved with the mr340, the Missouri River is considered by many other citizens to be little more than a freeway, the ultimate sewage treatment plant discharge point for about one-third of our nation, or a willing participant as a recipient of nutrient laden sediment. These attitudes need to change; not just about the MO river but also with regards to the tributary streams.

The 2 barrels in the above photo were seen in St. Charles' Frontier Park (adjacent to the finish). The distance to the MO River from this trib is less than 500 ft. The next big storm will likely carry the barrels and any remaining chemical inside them into the Mighty MO. Once in the MO the barrels can and from their its onto

2009 mr340: everyone came by boat by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

In our celebrity culture that seems to only want to recognize the comings, goings, and shenanigans of the beautiful, gifted, and wealthy it's easy to forget that most all of our ancestors arrived in the Midwest by water. Some came up the Mississippi and then the Missouri in all sorts of water craft but many crossed the ocean of prairie grass in boats of a different sort. Back then, these travels, many of which lasted for weeks or months, were more often called the way to go rather than a crazy adventure.

spring rise on the mo river by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

The much talked about and frequently overstated U.S. Army Corps of Engineers (USACE) sponsored spring rise on the Missouri River arrived this week in Missouri. The rise is represented by the small bubble that peaked on the 24th at Leavenworth and the 25th at Kansas City. Preceding the USACE event is a much larger spring rise sponsored by the wacky, irreverent environmental group known as Mother Nature. That group, using an untested method that some refer to as a "rain dance", also plans a small rise for this week that will likely mask any remains of the USACE pulse in downstream river reaches.

Missouri Governor Jay Nixon unsuccessfully sued to have the rise stopped. And current Missouri Attorney General Chuck Koster, who wants to be Missouri's next U.S. Senator, called the spring rise a "man-made flood" and warned that, "we're risking the lives and livelihoods of Missourians" with this event. Their overreaction is likely due to a sincere desire to cultivate friends, allies, and large political contributions from Farm Bureau members but Koster was probably right about one thing when he said that "the benefit may be non-existent."

Just to be on the safe side, residents still are urged to seek higher ground.

big mud, big clean-up, big muddy by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

From your pals @ MO River Relief.
Missouri River Cleanup. On the river!
Saturday, October 4 at 9:00 a.m., La Benite Park, Sugar Creek, MO

Come join us on a beautiful fall weekend to clean-up our beloved Big Muddy at our sixth annual KC area Missouri River Relief Clean-up.

This year's event will be headquartered at gorgeous La Benite Park in Sugar Creek, MO, just east of Kansas City, MO. Click here for more info and directions. This is the stretch of river downstream of the Blue River. With all the high water this year, there's tons of trash washed up on shore to get out there! We need your help! Register online by clicking here.

The clean-up starts at 9:00, with registration opening at 8:30. You'll be shuttled by boat out onto the banks of the Missouri, where you'll be dropped off to pick up all the trash you can possibly bag up. You'll be brought back to the park for lunch.

All volunteers receive work gloves, trash bags, an event t-shirt, a water bottle and lunch.

This event is rain or shine, so dress weather appropriately. Mud boots and long pants are recommended. No flip-flops are allowed on boats. Sunscreen, sunglasses, bug spray and a reusable water container are recommended. If you have young kids, please bring lifejackets that fit. We have a limited supply of child sizes. Adult supervision is required for kids under 14.

Thanks, and we'll see you on the river!

Missouri River Relief
find out more:
mo river relief

mr340 river race update no.18 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race update no.18

OK, we'd be remiss if we didn't send shouts out to those who helped us this year. Sarah Star, who worried like a parent worries about their children, and who along with the other Sarah, fetched our car from Kaw Point and had the brilliant idea to have it detailed of 1 years worth of river mud and Rare West Tibetan Dog hair. Awesome idea.

Wendy Sangster, Bonnie Chasteen, and Jim Low, all of the Missouri Department of Conservation who served as Warrior Ant Press field operatives and brought us needed supplies. Garry Manhart who met me @ midnight @ the Washington boat ramp with the last of my supplies and found the only spot around the boat ramp by which to land a kayak in the dark. River Relief West Coast Coordinator Vicki and her pal Susie who made me a cup of french press by the fire at Weldon Springs and told me to shut up and "get back to nature, you only have 3 more hours to go" when all I wanted was a biscuit. Joan G. Friend who drove me to the car rental shop at Lambert International and roasted a leg ó lamb extraordinaire to bring us back into the fold of civilization and the daunting task of running the WorldWide Anthill Headquarters. To the nurse @ Glasgow who taught me that duct tape works wonders on foot blisters and to the unnamed support person (paddlefast, live slow) who gave me packs of ice @ Mokane Access and Herman that finally allowed me to get some much needed sleep.

Hurrah! See you next year on the muddy mo unless we're lucky enough to visit on a river near you.

View a sideshow of all the images from the 2008 Missouri River 340 as well as images from the 2007 and 2006 events @:
warrior ant press mr340 slide show
breathe.paddle.sing. the 2007 mr340
2006 mr340 race journal

mr340 river race update no. 17 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 rivermiles update no. 17

Some of the peeps in and around this year's event.

The last two finishers were in a beautiful boat they'd built themselves and were still learning how to pilot it when the race begin.

Two of my favorite rivermiles smiley faces, Travis and Karin. Travis saw me after my 'swim in the river" and had the decency not to laugh out loud.

scott rivermiles, The master of ceremony.

mr340 river race update no. 16 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race update no. 16-team division

We're not going to try and dissect the team division because they flew off the front so fast we barely had time to see the windmill flash of paddles. Let's just say that according to one member of the winning boat, it's better to have 6 captains, than one. Everyone's in charge and no one is. Puking. Part of the game. We'll cover for you for a while but get it together because it's going to look real bad if that surfer dude in a solo boat beats us.

I guess the passengers on these boats, which are traveling at almost 10 miles an hour, have time to enjoy the scenery and the moonrises during the race, I don't see how they can't. 'There's not much else out there to distract you from them. One of the more interesting teams in this year's race, team Z, was a mixed team tandem with 2 men and 2 women. Competeting against teams of 6 men, they had little chance, but they did finish 10th overall in a time of 51 hrs and 24 min.

Moon set on day 1, downstream of Miami. This race is always held during the full moon of either late July or early August. Once the moon sets, it's pretty dark out. You can still see the water, but if you hear growling ahead, better drop the paddles and make sure you're on the right side of the river lest you find yourself unexpectedly testing your whitewater skills in the dead of the night.

And here's the moon rise on day 3 near the approach to Berger Bend. This was definitely one of the more scenic parts of the river. The "growlers" (as Bryan Hopkins likes to call them) could be heard for several miles above the bend. The river gradient steepens through here and there's easily a mile or so of either natural riffles or man-made rock and wing dikes that line river right. They were partly submerged and it sounded like Niagara Falls on the approach. River left is a meander cut-off with a large (several square miles) copse of trees. There was enough drift from the recent floods crammed against the front of this copse to power every wood stove in the Ozarks through the winter.

mr340 river race update no.15 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race update no.15

Mixed tandem and cutest couple (?) winners Jana Shannon (Durham, NC) and Mike Massey (Bellingham, WA) of Immersing Ourselves. They came from opposite coasts, had no expectations of placing, got to the first checkpoint in the lead and never looked back. They seemed to be more relaxed than most folks I met, although I only saw them at the start and finish, so who knows the demons they had to conquer on the water. They certainly seemed to be enjoying themselves and not taking things too seriously, but yet had the quiet resolve of someone who knits their own rugby socks. Winning? Oh that was an unexpected surprise.

Men's tandem winners, "Cattledrive" If you see 2 Texicans in your rear view mirror in this race, move river right and yield. That cracking you hear, it's not your ribs, it's a bullwhip. Move along, get 'em up. In rain and wind and weather keep them dogies rollin'.

Women's tandem winners Tabatha Adkins (Gower, MO) and Chris Jump (Lawrence, KS) of RED2[squared]. Notice the dazed look of sleep deprivation. This will disappear in about 12 hours; the hair color won't.

mr340 river race update no.14 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race update no.14 - warrior ant press women's solo division.

The winners of the 2008 MR340 Warrior Ant Press Women's Solo Division were:
1st Place. Katie Pfefferkorn. 50 hours.

2nd Place. Erin Magee. Texas, 57 hours 11 min.

3rd Place. Hillary Kelly, Leavenworth, Kansas. 69 hours 2 min.

The race for 1st place was pretty close, closer than the time difference might indicate. Erin Magee lead by as much as 1.5 hours for the first 200 miles of this race, from Kansas City to Cooper's Landing. Something happened in the 26.5 miles between Coopers Landing and Jefferson City to turn the race around. I don't know exactly what that was, but if we find out, we'll post an update. Could have been that Erin just pushed too hard for the first 200 miles and couldn't hold the pace (unlikely) or got over-heated (more likely), don't really know. Katie typically runs a very patient and controlled race and it's not uncommon for her to pass you about 2 miles into the race as she tends to take it easy at the start, find her pace, and then just hold it for a really, really long time. In this case, for two straight days. When she goes by you, she appears to be paddling effortlessly and at this point, you'd better look close because you won't see each other until the end.

I typically find the stretch between Coopers Landing and Jeff City very difficult a couple of reasons. Foremost, it's the 2nd night and the sleep deprivation is really starting to kick in. Secondly, the winds are more often than not, southerly which means you're going into a headwind. Although the winds usually tail off at night, sometimes you can get that stiff summer breeze which feels great, unless you're exhausted and paddling against it. This year I just happened to paddle this section with Hillary Kelly, the 3rd place finisher. About 3/4's from Cooper's Landing to Jeff City (around 4 am) in the morning, we were both so exhausted we couldn't keep from nodding off in the boat. The head snap is what brings you back and when it does, it's kinda scary. Apparently, this head snap is some kind of hormonal release that causes your head to snap back. When this happens in the boat your first thought is you're going to fall in the river and after about 20 times it happens over the course of a half-an-hour about all you can think about is, I'm going to die if I don't get off this river and get some sleep. The last morning I actually fell asleep while trying to paddle. Hillary told me the same thing happened to her. Guess the body isn't just prepared to do 3 straight days of no sleep.

All of these women beat me to the finish line which really isn't surprising because they're very fine athletes and very tough. You may think you're tough, but there's always someone tougher than you on the river. Hillary, who was once one of the few and the proud, also spent a year on square-rigged sailing ship. Not only is she a better paddler than I am, she's also a better sailor.

Photo of Erin Magee by Carter Johnson.

mr340 river race update no. 13 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race update no. 13 men's solo division

Some of the participants in the men's solo division.

Carter Johnson, who now holds the course record in all of the major ultra-marathon canoe races (MR340, Texas Water Safari, Everglades Challenge, and Yukon quest) at the start of this year's race. Johnson shattered the previous record by 10 hours, paddling the 340 miles in 37 hours 46 minutes. He was beaten only by a 6-person tandem boat full of Texans, all of whom have their own heavy-duty, ultra-marathon credentials, and they only beat him by an hour and a half. Johnson was racing in a Huki surf-ski an evil reflective-tape grin that just screams "you're annihilation is about to begin."

3rd place finisher Chuck McHenry finished in 2 days. McHenry's never met a river he couldn't paddle upstream on. If this race was 340 miles of whitewater, he'd be the favorite every time.

Big Tiny, racing in his first ultra-marathon finished in a respectable 76.5 hours.

Joe Mann, in just his second year of kayaking finished 4th. Joe expects to move to Texas, train with the Insance Clown Posse down there, and return home next year with some even more serious intentions.

Left to right. John Mann, field captain for Joe "the dark horse paddler" Mann, Black Coffee, and Uncle A Dog. In the world of "what's the craziest thing you've ever done" these dudes have one upped everybody. Coffee and A Dog paddled the mr340 in their home-made kayaks in 2.5 days with their dissembled bikes strapped to back and a home-made trailer stowed in the hatch. Less than 12-hours later, they were preparing to return to Kansas City via the Katy Trail pulling their kayaks behind themselves. Purportedly, they had a logical reason for doing this but I don't recall exactly what it was. I think it might have been, "we'll we've never done that -- yet."

mr340 river race update no. 12 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race update no. 12

We're back on land, where the food is more than gogo juice, power bars, and fruit leather. I really have to work on the gogo juice recipe because maybe in another couple of days the mouth ulcers will have healed from all the acid. That was one mistake we made, another was dropping the first aid kit with the lip balm into the river on day 2 resulting in second degree lip burn. between the mouth ulcers, the lip burn, and the sleep deprivation I talk like I'm drunk.

Another mistake, compounded by sleep-deprivation, stupidity, and inefficient preparation involved attempting to obliquely surf the wake of the river relief safety boat which resulted in a swim in the muddy mo. It was hot anyway and that's a good way to cool off, but thank goodness for pfd's.

More later.

mr340 river race update no.11 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race. update no.11
This might be our last post for awhile. The batteries, both the OLPC notebook and mine are in serious need of recharging. We may just have to wait till St.Charles and not post till sometime on Saturday. The leader board should let you know if we've finished.

We're trying to track down a persistent, yet unconfirmed rumor, that keeps getting passed downriver and upriver like power-bar gas. Seems like what originated as good-natured banter between some of the more testosterone-riddled men's tandem teams eventually escalated until the teams took turns hurling captain's bottles at each others boats. For the river-unininiated, a captain's bottle is a bottle of whiz, done on the go, and apparently these tandem teams were trading plastic captains bottles with loosened lids as though they were water-balloons. One can only imagine the rage of getting bombed by one of these would tend to inspire, especially in 90-degree heat. Sounds a bit like a bloody lot of footballers, if you ask me.

All of that piss and vinegar got me to thinking about the only non-human (not counting the lonestar state paddling machines) who's ever competed in the mr340 and that would your friend and mine, Trex, the rare West Tibetan Mountain Dog. Trex loves to mark things as well. If only he were here to hike his leg on some unsuspecting rednecks. That'd be perfect.

real-time race results

mr340 river race update no.10 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race. update no. 10
I smell like a pole cat. So I took a bath in the river. Naked. Nothing like being naked in the river in the summer time. It feels great.

All those power bars are full of fiber. You definitely want to stay regular out here. So I took a big crap on a corps wing dike. Man. It took a boulder to cover that thing but if felt great.

A bath. The loss of a weighty subject matter. I feel like a new person. Time to wrap this up.

real-time race results

mr340 river race update no.9 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race update no.9

Food consumed to date (what I can remember):
1 bowl of oatmeal w/ raisins and banana
1 homemade gravlax sandwich on toasted farmhouse pepita bread.
1 peanut butter sandwich/banana on toasted farmhouse pepita bread.
2 oranges.
2 cups fresh cherries.
2 tubes of homemade goo (brown rice syrup/agave syrup/chocolate/p.nut butter/coffee).
8 power bars of various permutations containing in no particular order: almonds, sesame seeds, hemp seeds, rasins, coconut, apricots, dates, peanuts, date syrup, and who knows what else.
GO GO jelly bellies. These are great. Elecrolyte jelly beans. 2 packages.
1 bag of granola including also homemade dried pears, cherries, apricots, and chocolat-covered raisins.
4 sheets of homemade fruit leather-blueberry, cherry, apricot.
1 12 oz bar of extra dark chocolat.

Pretty much everything is done to maintain the following.
~200-300 calories per hour
~40-60 g of carbohydrates
~10 g of protein

real-time race results

mr340 river race update no.8 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race. update no.8 - more smiley faces

This is the smiley face you can see between mile marker 160 and 150. This is what paddling for 20 hours a days for 2 straight days will do to you. It's the electric Gatorade acid test and all I can say, is you'd better embrace it, go with it, ride it out, or you're in trouble. Dawn will come soon enough.

Sometime this smiley face will attach itself to a can buoy. When that happens, just say hi and keep going. You make it through to the other side and you're go to go to the finish. This is why some people do this race. For the hallucinations that happen on the second night. It's a vision quest thing? without the mescaline. perhaps it's just the quirky combination of sleep deprivation and electrolyte imbalance.

Smiles 2 ya!

real-time race results

mr340 river race update no.7 by Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

mr340 river race update no. 7

Nun buoy on the left, can buoy on the right. Going downstream keep the left-leaning nuns on your left and the jar heads on your right and the shipping channel, the deepest, fastest, part of the current is right between them -- right in the middle! They mark the channel. I know the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers has spent millions and millions and millions of our tax dollars to straighten and narrow the channel for the 2 barges a year that use the upper Missouri, but that's a pretty narrow channel. I went around this freaky pair.

real-time race results